Giving Effective Feedback - Conduct Discussion

Plan the interaction:

Gather all the information available about the behavior in question and its effect on the team. Ask yourself what you would do if the recipient were to object to what you understand to be the facts, or if there were evidence you didn’t know about.
Create a discussion plan. Write down what you want to talk about and anticipate reactions. Craft some follow-up responses.
Prepare to listen, not just talk. Anticipate the questions.
Consider what you want to get out of the discussion, both in the short term and the long term.
Points to prepare:
- One-line overview of the situation.
- Objective report of the behavior.
- Objective report of the effect on the team or project.
- Potential objections to the objective report and how you’ll address them.
- Discussion plan
  1. Present facts;
  2. Listen to recipient version;
  3. Make clear what specifically will not be tolerated;
  4. Brainstorm ways to avoid frustration in the future.
- Possible barriers to the feedback.
- Ways to overcome the barriers.
- What questions do you have?
- What questions might you be asked?
- Desired short-term result(s)
- Desired long-term result(s**

Initiate the exchange:

Sit without physical obstacles, such as tables or desks, between you.
Avoid interruptions. Focus on the person.
Adapt your communication style to that of the recipient.
Assume a tone close to that of an experienced teacher. Show confidence in the guidance, but don’t be patronizing.
Consider the recipient’s point of view and perspective.
Imagine yourself in the other person’s shoes.
Be sensitive to ways in which gender, race, age, or other differences might affect the recipient’s response to your feedback. Some people might find direct-to-the-point feedback demotivating.

Engage in dialogue:

Listen actively. Concentrate on the message and implications rather than on your response.
Notice nonverbal cues. Take note of the recipients body language and tone.
Monitor your own reactions. Sitting back and crossing your arms both imply resistance.
Paraphrase what the recipient says. By restating her response in different words. If anything is unclear, ask more questions until both are on the same page.
Receive feedback openly:
- Listen carefully to other point of view.
- Let your defences down.
- Resist the urge to justify the behavior or actions that are criticised.
- Identify what you can learn from the feedback.
- Come up with a plan of action.
- Finally, recognize when criticism of your behavior, even when valid, has no place in the current conversation. In that case set aside a separate time to discuss that feedback

Develop an action plan:

Specify next steps.
- Look together for ways to improve.
- Emphasize the effect of behavior on others.
- Offer a carrot. Find more and interesting and satisfying assignments for the employee to work on as an incentive to arrive on time.
- Use a stick. Require results, and establish explicit consequences for tardiness.
- Seek an alternative.
Summarize the plan.
Have the recipient show that they know what the next steps are.
Explicitly ask how they feel about the plan. If any points seem unresolved, be open to clarifying or revising them.
Identify when and how a follow-up will occur. Be specific.
Set a time frame for achieving the primary goal and smaller goals along the way.
Make sure there’s a mutual ownership of the plan

Follow up:

Check in regularly to ensure that the action plan is on track.
Ask the employee to describe her progress. Encourage frankness on the progress.
Be explicit about any improvements you are noticing. Offer praise and reinforcement.
Be frank if you notice that progress has been too slow or is not happening at all. Discuss how to get back on track.

Assess yourself:

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